New immigrants come to Canada with high hopes and expectations. While their dreams and expectations come true by the passage of time, it doesn’t happen within a blink of eye. Getting settled and pursuing dreams takes time and patience. In the path towards success, there are failures, rejections, disappointments and challenges. All these, if taken negatively, can cause low self-esteem. Low self-esteem, although not an illness, can have a negative effect on our personality and our daily functioning. This article is about low self-esteem, identifying it, the consequences of ignoring low self-esteem and self-help tips for dealing with it.
Check your self-esteem
Are you interested in knowing whether you are a person with high self-esteem or one with low self-esteem? Here is a check list for you to determine whether you have high or low self-esteem.
- I can’t believe in myself.
- I often blame myself.
- I often behave despondently.
- I have lost control.
- I feel victimized in many situations.
- I am defensive when it comes to me.
- I am undeserving.
- I feel worried most of the time.
- I can’t take risks.
- I can’t trust my instincts.
- I am antisocial sometimes.
- I express anger and aggression passively.
- I am not good enough.
- I cannot change.
- I am negative most of the time.
- I think I am a failure.
- I am fearful of new situations and I am reluctant to welcome new opportunities.
- I am ineffective.
- I am not good enough.
- I feel pessimistic.
- I am critical most of the time.
If you have checked most of the items listed above you have low self-esteem. If you have low self-esteem and you want to feel good about yourself, be happy and relaxed, be confident and create a new you who can finally bring your dreams into reality.
Now you know whether you have high self-esteem or low. If you have low self-esteem and you are not concerned about improving it you are at high risk of many dangers. It can stop you from leading the life you wish to lead. Following are the consequences if you do not plan to improve your self-esteem.
- Low self-esteem can hinder you from welcoming new challenges and new opportunities in life.
- It can seriously impair your social and occupational functioning and you can become socially isolated because of your low self-esteem.
- Social isolation can lead to feelings of anxiety and depression which in turn can develop into mental health problems over time. In fact most cases of depression are the result of low self-esteem.
- Low self-esteem can damage relationships thus causing break-ups.
- Low self-esteem can have a negative impact on the way you see yourself thus having a negative view of self.
- Low self-esteem can lead to drug abuse in the long run.
Although self-esteem is not a mental health problem it can lead to one. Before you are caught up in the trap of low self-esteem, be proactive and get ready to improve the way you are living your life now.
Tips to improve self-esteem
- Positive Self-talk: Positive self-talk has a magical effect on individuals with low self-esteem. Self-talk is often negative. If you start talking positively to yourself, it will make you feel better.
- Stop Acting like the intellectual king: If you are serious about being number one all the time, it is possible that you are behaving like “Jack of all”. Keep an eye on your thoughts and you’ll be surprised to know how our thinking patterns are sometimes irrational.
- Do not compare yourself to others: Comparing ourselves to others makes us too competitive. When we feel lacking behind in competition, it affects our self-esteem. Every individual is different with his own strengths and weaknesses.
- Focus on the things you can change: Stephen Covey in his book “7 Habits of Highly Effective People” talks about two circles; a circle of influence and a circle of concern. We need to work in circle of influence where we can exert control and should not worry about circle of concern. As our circle of influence expands our circle of concern starts narrowing down.
- Surround yourself with supportive people: If the people around you are pulling your legs and are always critical, you are in danger zone. Try to find the company of supportive people who encourage and uplift you
